What feeds your soul

Yesterday my friend Bonnie over at Faith Barista asked the question, “What helps you relax as a mom, what feeds your soul?” I have to be honest, I’m not sure I can answer this question. Right now, I’m depressed. I’m struggling with where our life is right now. I know that God will see us through this time in our lives and bring all of this mess around to His glory one day, but I’m struggling. I’m struggling with how our lives got to this point. How we ended up here. There were so many things out of this life that I wanted and imagined for my son. And now I find myself asking God, “What is going on? Why are we in this place? This was not the plan, Lord.”

I am grateful that God doesn’t mind our questions. In fact, he prefers we be honest with Him through our struggles. At least then we have an open line of communication with Him. We are talking. That’s what He wants, to talk to us, to hear our hearts, to help us get through our struggles. Some days all I can do is let my soul cry out and let the Holy Ghost take those murmurings to the Father for me because some days, I can’t even begin to say anything but “Please, God.” Someone asked me last night what I do for me during this time of struggle. I didn’t have an answer for her. My whole life seems to be consumed by this. She challenged me to find some ways to make at least a little time for myself every week, to not lose myself in this time. I feel like I have been losing myself piece by piece. It’s not fun to look up and realize that the things I used to love, the things I used to take time to do are no longer part of my life. So, I guess my answer to Bonnie and my friend is that I’m going to have to figure that out. I’m going to have to figure out how to feed my soul and find ways to relax. I’m open to suggestions 🙂 Whitespace Community Linkup @ faithbarista.com

8 thoughts on “What feeds your soul

  1. I’m so sorry, April. When we’re in the midst of a miry mess, it feels like quicksand pulling us down, and it’s so hard to see the glory round the corner. I know the feeling of only being able to cry “Please, God!” And sometimes it’s “HELP!” or when even that doesn’t come out, just sighs and groans. Praying for God to lift you out of this, April. “God looked out from His high holy place; from heaven He surveyed the earth. He listened to the groans of the doomed, He opened the doors of their death cells.” (Psalm 102 The Message)

    1. Thank you so much for the kind, encouraging words and the Scripture. It made me smile. I cling to Psalm 61:2 right now, “When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”

  2. It doesn’t have to be anything big to help. In my hard times, I’ve tried to notice when a rare smile appears on my face and take note of what made it arise. Often it’s been a tv show, or sometimes a funny blog. I even did a dance game on the wii (when alone in the house) because it felt good to bop around to music without worrying about what I looked like. Also going for a walk alone and noticing something beautiful about the creation around me – a flower, the sunset, the shape of the clouds in the sky, the greeness of grass – I guess that’s a little bit of mindfulness that can help. Listening to music and reading are two of the major things that make me happy and I neglected them for some time due to depression – I’ve tried to put them back into my life too.

  3. Just sharing here is a way to nourish your soul as people respond to your needs. Grab hold of some promises of God that speak to your situation and speak them aloud, declaring Gods a Word! Sounds so simple but there is power in our words!

    Coming from Bonnies. http://Www.myautumnyears.blogspot.com
    Not our rainbow family…….

  4. Sweet April, the sheer vulnerability of this post is so sacred. This is very hard what you’re having to face, by yourself as a single parent. But, maybe you can find some solace to know in fact you are not alone because there are friends like me who understand the sadness and fear and questions that swirl around you, even as you trust in God and are being carried by Him. It is very hard in the moment of all these difficulties and it’s so important that you do take care of yourself somehow. I am praying right now that God would reach out and soothe and calm your heart as it quivers — and to softly, gently comfort your soul. And as you feel His presence, you may feel a prompting in your heart – to feel what it is that might be your spiritual whitespace. Someway of creating space that’s just for you to be you. I hope you can somehow get some rest, as I’m guessing you must be tired from the worries and stress of your son and all the other hard things that’s happening. I pray God can provide you some kind of respite – even if brief – -and I pray your heart will hear His whispers and have some idea/prompting of what tht might be. Hugs to you, and many more hugs. Bonnie

    1. Bonnie, for some reason, I just now saw this comment, though I believe it to be a God-thing that I didn’t get it before now. Your words were so precious to me. Even though I have only known you through blogging, I feel as if I know you as a friend and am grateful for you. Thank you for speaking to my soul today when I feel God needed me to hear it.

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